Martha Jane Cannary, known by most as Calamity Jane, is a woman who knew what she wanted, went to get it, and never looked back. In my research of Calamity Jane is she is one of those people who wrote her own story. In fact, today, we still don’t know how much of her story – the one she penned and we read – is considered to be is true and how much is complete fabrication. She is known as quite the spinner of tales. The fact that fascinates me about this is that Calamity Jane decided she wanted to be a legend, so she lived and dreamed a legendary life worth us remembering.
Do you have any friends like Calamity Jane? Do you have people in your life who encourage you to simply – be legendary? Do they challenge you to take risks, fall in love, chase the dream, ask for more money, or stand up for what you believe to be right?
My friend Shari once described me to her children as that one crazy friend who just encourages you to go for it! I believe women are often times too scared to succeed. We don’t want to outshine someone or have people think we are too “all-that” or we fear that someone will realize we are an imposture and not actually qualified and good enough. So to hide the secret of our incompetance, or our insecurity, we settle for less than we ultimately desire. I challenge you to not apologize for wanting success, and for going and grabbing it with a Calamity Jane kind of fearlessness.
Which reminds me of a book I am reading. titled, Women Don’t Ask, co-authored by Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever. The premise of the book is that women do not ask for what they want professionally. They don’t ask or negotiate for raises, promotions, or more quality of life. By not negotiating a starting salary for a first job, a woman may sacrifice over half a million dollars in earnings by the end of her career. DID YOU HEAR THAT? One half million dollars all because on your very first job, you didn’t have the confidence to negotiate and ask for a little more than was being offered.
Girls – take to heart my message. You must know what you want, and be prepared to ask for it. Quoting Calamity, “I figure if a girl wants to become a legend then she should just go ahead and be one.” I suggest if you want to make more money, get more out of your life, or enjoy the luxuries of work/life balance, then you better ask for it. You may need to ask a boss, a future employer, or yourself. But only you are responsible. Go for it. Want success and then have the confidence to ask for what you need to attain that vision of success.
Thank you so much for joining me, Rachael Melot on my #SuccessWithoutApology journey. If you want to write out want you want so we can all hold you accountable, go ahead. Write it – claim it – ask for it. I want you to go get.